In the context of a sexual encounter, I'd never been intentionally choked before. Actually, I'd never been intentionally choked ever (just accidentally choked by a random piece of chicken or while performing oral sex), but being intentionally choked by Andy was surprisingly erotic. I guess that's why it's called erotic asphyxiation, eh? Reflecting on my encounters with Andy, I'm not sure what I felt when he choked me. Perhaps a little lightheaded and obviously unable to breath. I wasn't sure how or what I was supposed to feel, but I guess it doesn't matter since it was my experience and I could feel however I damn well pleased. Mostly I felt exhilarated and aroused by giving up control and entrusting Andy with my safety - it was paradoxically liberating and surprisingly healing given the abusive nature of my first marriage.
Geek that I am, I did some quick internet research. What do people usually feel when they engage in erotic asphyxiation? Maybe they're supposed to learn what they're supposed to feel? According to Howard Becker's 1953 study of Chicago jazz musicians, people learn how to become marijuana users so perhaps I need to learn how to be a gasper? What's a gasper? Well, here's a little lesson: erotic asphyxiation (aka breath control play) is the "intentional restriction of oxygen to the brain for sexual arousal" (Wikipedia, a source I would never let my students use). A person engaging in this activity is called a gasper. Erotic asphyxiation is classified as a paraphilia in the DSM (Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of the American Psychological Association). Paraphilia is sexual arousal by objects, situations, or individuals that are not part of normative stimulation. I won't launch into a lecture about the social construction of normative and deviant behavior, or normative stimulation in this case; we'd be here all day. Paraphilia is not diagnosable as a psychiatric disorder unless it causes harm to others or distress to the individual. So it seems that Andy and I are healthy people who enjoy deviant sexual behavior and are not afflicted with psychiatric disorders. Sweet. I knew deviant sexual behavior lurked inside me - it just needed to be coaxed out by Andy. Sweeter.
Erotic asphyxiation may cause giddiness, lightheadedness and pleasure which may heighten orgasm, or could lead to a lucid, semi-hallucinogenic state called hypoxia. The rush of hypoxia + orgasm is allegedly similar to that of cocaine, and highly addictive. Now that I've learned some of the feelings associated with erotic asphyxiation, I'm excited for my next sexual encounter with Andy (assuming there's another one on the horizon) so I can see if I notice any of these symptoms. How I love experiments!
It seems erotic asphyxiation could be a consciousness-altering experience. According to Dr. Andrew Weil, humans attempt to alter their consciousness in various ways. Children exhibit this behavior by whirling, spinning, hyperventilating followed by choking, and tickling. Remember what it felt like to spin around on the merry-go-round? Dizzying, but also nauseating? Or riding on a roller coaster or carnival rides? Even laughter and dreaming alter our consciousness, as do legal and illicit drugs, exercise, music, and sex. Chocolate is one of my favorite drugs. Yes, chocolate is a drug. Just expand your definition of "drug" to include any substance or behavior that alters your physical, mental, or emotional state. Sex with Andy is now my favorite drug, although it's not available as often as I'd like and I'm having withdrawal symptoms. Hee hee.
Geek that I am, I did some quick internet research. What do people usually feel when they engage in erotic asphyxiation? Maybe they're supposed to learn what they're supposed to feel? According to Howard Becker's 1953 study of Chicago jazz musicians, people learn how to become marijuana users so perhaps I need to learn how to be a gasper? What's a gasper? Well, here's a little lesson: erotic asphyxiation (aka breath control play) is the "intentional restriction of oxygen to the brain for sexual arousal" (Wikipedia, a source I would never let my students use). A person engaging in this activity is called a gasper. Erotic asphyxiation is classified as a paraphilia in the DSM (Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of the American Psychological Association). Paraphilia is sexual arousal by objects, situations, or individuals that are not part of normative stimulation. I won't launch into a lecture about the social construction of normative and deviant behavior, or normative stimulation in this case; we'd be here all day. Paraphilia is not diagnosable as a psychiatric disorder unless it causes harm to others or distress to the individual. So it seems that Andy and I are healthy people who enjoy deviant sexual behavior and are not afflicted with psychiatric disorders. Sweet. I knew deviant sexual behavior lurked inside me - it just needed to be coaxed out by Andy. Sweeter.
Erotic asphyxiation may cause giddiness, lightheadedness and pleasure which may heighten orgasm, or could lead to a lucid, semi-hallucinogenic state called hypoxia. The rush of hypoxia + orgasm is allegedly similar to that of cocaine, and highly addictive. Now that I've learned some of the feelings associated with erotic asphyxiation, I'm excited for my next sexual encounter with Andy (assuming there's another one on the horizon) so I can see if I notice any of these symptoms. How I love experiments!
It seems erotic asphyxiation could be a consciousness-altering experience. According to Dr. Andrew Weil, humans attempt to alter their consciousness in various ways. Children exhibit this behavior by whirling, spinning, hyperventilating followed by choking, and tickling. Remember what it felt like to spin around on the merry-go-round? Dizzying, but also nauseating? Or riding on a roller coaster or carnival rides? Even laughter and dreaming alter our consciousness, as do legal and illicit drugs, exercise, music, and sex. Chocolate is one of my favorite drugs. Yes, chocolate is a drug. Just expand your definition of "drug" to include any substance or behavior that alters your physical, mental, or emotional state. Sex with Andy is now my favorite drug, although it's not available as often as I'd like and I'm having withdrawal symptoms. Hee hee.
If you try erotic asphyxiation, please be safe. Andy is experienced, so I was lucky in this regard. Even so, I have my mom's number on my fridge in case something goes awry. My step-sister's would-be-fiance died in December of autoerotic asphyxia. He was alone, tied a rope around his neck to asphyxiate himself presumably while he was masturbating, the chair he was standing on gave way, and he accidentally killed himself.
On that happy note, until next time...
On that happy note, until next time...
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